The Mask and The Monster

You would have never guessed that anyone could act out in this way, at least not anyone who claimed to be as "intelligent" as they did. They don't care about social norms, because they can not adapt to them. So since they will not be accepted they walk around with a "I don't give a fuck" attitude. And although, at times that is the type of attitude you need to succeed in this world. It is not the type of attitude that will bring people closer to you.

Maybe the monster was hiding something.
Maybe they really would rather have a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend.


I don't think any man that says "I'm not ready to have a girlfriend right now" really means that. Its not that you are not ready because how do you ever really know if you are? You just no longer want to be with me and or you are a gay man trying to deny that you have an attraction to men.


Maybe that's why the monster crept out.

I have seen my fair share of UGLINESS. In all forms. In all colors. In all situations. But never have I encountered someone who could eat up love, kindness, compassion and care as fast as they could. Grinding their teeth on the bones of compassion. Drinking the blood of love; draining love of all its' energy. Taking, but never giving back due to their "I don't give a fuck" attitude.

At first the monster was hidden by the mask. They would put their mask on and act as "normal" as possible. They would laugh. They would sing. They would feel joy in their life. They knew peace in their heart. But the second the mask was not on they would change. They would scream. They would throw things. They would stomp around, causing a violent shake. And they would not take any responsibility.





Well, one day the mask was nowhere in sight. And the monster stayed out. It covered the sunshine. It stood staggering in the rain high above the clouds. It was vicious. It was manipulative. Its nostrils flared and its teeth were sharper than razors. It was ready to attack. Eyes wild with dancing fire in their pupils. Heart rate accelerated past anything consider normal for a human.


I tried to soothe the monster with a song. I tried to soothe the monster with a hug or a kiss on the forehead. I tried to soothe the monster with laughter. But the kinder I was the more it wanted to attack me. I kept trying. And it continued to get angry. "GET OUT!" Yelled the monster. Every horrible word you could think of fell from their lips. Every hurtful thought you would think to say to your worst enemy pierced my heart. They wanted me to suffer for loving them. They wanted me to hurt, for caring about them. And it didn't make sense. Oh, how I wish they had the mask at that time. Then they would have been able to see how sincere I was...  But, I got out before it could do me physical harm. And they drove away leaving the memory of ugly in my brain. 


It was the second time that physical abuse was so near to me. The first time, it was right in my face.