I'm still here in VA. I'm not really sure why, because most of those who I thought were supportive of me have turned their back against me. I really should go home, but I enjoy the church I attended and I like being apart of souls4real. They are a community gospel group, passionate and on fire for God.
Yet, in my own time I find that I am lonely and I still feel somewhat hurt by all the unexpected events that took place. Why should I stay in a town where the only person that I trusted and said that I could talk to about anything and everything, no longer wants to speak to me? The only real friend I had, can't even text me back. We went from talking every single day, to nothing at all. And there is no explanation. Just poof gone. Disappeared.
How can you tell someone that you love and care about them and then turn around and disappear on them, when they need you the most?
It is messed up. And everyone who hears that part of my testimony will agree. But, God will take care of them. I believe and trust that.
I love them very much, still yet. And whenever they want to be in my life again the door is always open. But the next time they come back they have to come back correct and in their right mind.
Right now, I have been praying for guidance in the right direction. I need to make sure that this area is where God really needs for me to be.
The other thing on top of that is that I no longer have the job that I originally started with, because they would not understand about employee safety. They didn't care. I'm not going to work for a company that doesn't care about employee safety.
When I started the job I was excited to have it, because I still had the support of my friend. So they would come pick me up from work and I would get home at a decent hour. But, after they abandon me I had to learn to take the bus and in taking the bus I didn't get home until around 9:30pm or even 10pm sometimes. Then I had to walk a mile in the dark.
Many people say that you need to take responsibility for your own self, but I guarantee that if the shoe was their foot they would want someone to understand and support them too. Nope, I'm not looking for a pity party. I don't like those, can't stand them. Waste too much time, but I am looking for those who know how to pray to pray that justice be done in the name of Jesus Christ and that all things be ordered in the Will of Abba, Father.
The shaking: The transition to Virginia.
The beating: the unexpected event
The pressing: the aftermath of the unexpected event
You don't treat the people bad that stood in the gap and interceded for you, that prayed for you constantly, the essentially took spiritual beatings for you, that introduced you to their resources so you could try to get a job, that stood by you and prayed while everything around you was falling a part.
No, you don't treat people like that...
And no, I wasn't perfect because "hurt begets hurt" and when the hurt came my flesh rose and it was horrible. But, I repented and I apologized to them.
You don't make a promise to be their and support them and then turn around and things aren't going well in your life just act like you never said those things.
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